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Author Topic: Vic(evi)  (Read 246465 times)

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Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #850 on: August 23, 2013, 08:11:48 PM »
Da, ima zanimljiva teorija o pojavi latentnih tempića highlandera, cak se provlaci i kroz viceve.
Interesantni psihopatoloski kontrasti pa samo da primetim da nisi izuzetak.
Samo nemoj da te to ohrabri.  :mrgreen:

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #851 on: August 23, 2013, 08:20:34 PM »
eto sad... izbjegavas odgovore kao malo dijete.
na sta si ti pomislio?
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #852 on: August 23, 2013, 08:23:02 PM »
Kao i ti, uvek na druga Tita (ili Titu ako hoces po tvom)

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #853 on: August 23, 2013, 08:26:13 PM »
sad ozbiljno, ako mi se upucavas, mrs u pizdu materinu pedercino odvratna. klecis na koljenima, kiti tepas da je tito..

alo moderacija, ko je pustio pedera ovamo?
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #854 on: August 23, 2013, 08:30:50 PM »
Sada se tek vidi seksualna konotacija svih pesama koje su pocinjale sa "druze Tito..." i ritualni trans kozarackih kola.
Stvarno na pomen svog idola Tita vidis muski polni organ?
Pa ti dokazujes i da je revolucija bila masovni psihoticni poremecaj.


Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #855 on: August 23, 2013, 08:32:40 PM »
jebo konju majku, prvo mi broji krvna zrnca, pa me locira po durmitoru, onda mi se udvara, a sad me psihoanalizira.
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #856 on: August 23, 2013, 08:33:56 PM »
Je l' tacno da kada vidite ovcu osim apetita dozivljavate i porast drugih nagona?

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #857 on: August 23, 2013, 08:35:18 PM »
ko?
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #858 on: August 23, 2013, 08:35:42 PM »
onda mi se udvara

O ovome ti govorim, kada god nesto napisem ti se pojavis da stidljivo prokomentarises.
Nisam ja ovca.  :mrgreen:

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #859 on: August 23, 2013, 08:37:34 PM »
ti si stvarno gora budala nego pareski vo, kukala vam majka oboici.
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #860 on: August 23, 2013, 08:39:47 PM »
oboici.

Koji je ovo jezik?
Znam da su duhoviti highlanderi tanki sa gramatikom ali ti si se otisnuo u svet interneta.

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #861 on: August 23, 2013, 08:42:01 PM »
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #862 on: August 23, 2013, 08:43:44 PM »
Ovo je neki dokaz da znas da pises?  :lol:

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #863 on: August 23, 2013, 08:47:05 PM »
na sta si pomislio dok si klecao?
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #864 on: August 23, 2013, 08:51:22 PM »

Pa rekao sam ti, na druga Tita i Vili Branta ali vazno je na sta si ti pomislio a to si nam lepo objasnio.

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #865 on: August 23, 2013, 08:54:18 PM »
pa ne, mislim, red bi bio da nam priznas.
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #866 on: August 23, 2013, 08:57:34 PM »

Vidim da uzivas  :lol:
Sledeci put kada me budes stidljivo pohvalio da sam duhovit zeleci da zapocnes konverzaciju, seti se da nisu svi rasli sa ovcama.

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #867 on: August 23, 2013, 08:58:16 PM »
i? na sta si pomislio?
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #868 on: August 23, 2013, 09:07:49 PM »
Da ti je decko od Vasojevica  :mrgreen:
Tempić, sada mozes da sevas i ne padaj u ocaj...naci ces vec nekog slicnog sebi.
Preterano si se brate emancipovao.

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #869 on: August 23, 2013, 09:10:59 PM »
serem ja malo. znamo svi na sta si pomislio. ok je.
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #870 on: August 23, 2013, 09:16:57 PM »
Pa to ti kazem, mozes da sevas slobodno, niko od tvojih jarana nece saznati za to.
Pravi zakljucak, odnosno razlog tvog stidljivog javljanja mogu da donesu samo oni koji znaju da citaju.

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #871 on: August 23, 2013, 09:36:22 PM »
- Kako se zove kad životinje pričaju kao ljudi?
- Basna.
- A kako se zove kad ljudi pričaju kao životinje?
- Bosna.

Offline slawen

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #872 on: August 24, 2013, 03:13:17 PM »
Ma ni po jada da tako samo prichaju....
We take no cash unless we cash justice for you! Are you listenin' to me? I'm givin' ya pearls hеrе!

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #873 on: August 25, 2013, 11:29:32 AM »
O ne, jos jedan Beni Hil.
Sta je ovo, u toku su forumsko-bosanske olimpijske igre?
Je l' to neki sport?

Offline slawen

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #874 on: August 25, 2013, 11:39:08 AM »
Шта ти је, што се тако понашаш?
We take no cash unless we cash justice for you! Are you listenin' to me? I'm givin' ya pearls hеrе!

Offline matador

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #875 on: August 25, 2013, 11:57:10 AM »
Ulazi Crnogorac u vagon pun crnaca, pa pita:
– Je l’ ođe nešto gorilo?

Offline E

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #876 on: August 25, 2013, 03:01:31 PM »
Kak je to romanticno, tempo i matador se muvaju  :lol:

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #877 on: August 25, 2013, 03:59:44 PM »
 :mrgreen:
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline Daisy

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #878 on: August 25, 2013, 05:29:46 PM »
Муж и жена су у продавници, жена купује хаљину. Проба један модел и пита мужа:
- Драги, како ми стоји ова?
- Хоћеш се наљутити ако будем искрен?
- Наравно да нећу!
- Јебао сам ти другарицу.
Više volim da mi se neko izveštačeno osmehne, nego da se spontano izdere na mene.

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #879 on: August 25, 2013, 05:38:18 PM »
 xrofl dobar
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline baggio

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #880 on: August 27, 2013, 07:24:54 PM »
CANADIAN AIR TRANSPORT SECURITY AUTHORITY AIRPORT BODY SCREENING RESULTS
 

 
FULL BODY SCANS AT CANADIAN AIRPORTS:

CATSA disclosed the following Airport Screening Results

December 2012 Statistics On Airport Full Body Screening From CATSA :

 
Terrorists Discovered 0
 
Transvestites  133
 
Hernias 1,485
 
Hemorrhoid Cases  3,172
 
Enlarged Prostates  8,249
 
Breast Implants  59,350
 
Natural Blondes  3
 

It was also discovered that 308 politicians had no balls.



Thought you'd like to know.
We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand - Randy Pauch

Offline Pijanista

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #881 on: September 12, 2013, 10:08:09 PM »
Vučić: Srbija ozbiljna država

Offline baggio

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #882 on: September 16, 2013, 04:01:03 PM »
Otišao Lala kod lekara, kaže da ne vidi ko prolazi sa druge strane ulice, sve mu mutno u očima.

Kaže mu doktor posle urađenih analiza:

- Lalo, loši su ti rezultati, holesterol, šećer, krvna slika... Ništa ne valja. Moraćeš da pripaziš na ishranu, manje slanog, masnog, kobasica, slanine, slatkog, vina, rakije, piva...

Razmisli Lala pa kaže:

- Znate šta doktore, kad ja malo bolje razmislim, ta marim ja ko prolazi s druge strane ulice.
We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand - Randy Pauch

Offline E

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Offline E

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Offline baggio

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #885 on: October 01, 2013, 09:53:06 PM »

I'd just  come out of the shop with a roast beef sandwich, large chips, ear of  corn & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I  haven't eaten for two days.'
I told him, 'I wish I had your will power.'

A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunchtime.
She said 'sorry about the wait'.
I said, 'Don't worry, you'll find a way to lose it eventually'.

I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop as I went into the bank.
When I came out, he looked at me and  said 'Any Change?'
I said, 'Nope, you're still black'.

Snow in  the forecast and the TV weather gal said she was expecting 8 inches  tonight.
I thought to myself, 'fat chance', with a face like that!

A 10-year old Irish boy stands crying at the side of the  road.
A man passing by asks 'What's wrong, lad?'
The boy says 'My ma  died this morning.'
'Oh bejaysus,' The man says. 'Do you want me to  call Father O'Riley for you?'
The boy replies, 'No thanks mister, sex is the last thing on my mind at the moment.'

Years ago it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away. But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best!

Japanese scientists  have now created a camera with such a fantastic shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth closed.

I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you could look at an unattended bag on a train or bus and think to yourself. I'm going to take that.'

I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a local bar until the last question which I got wrong.
The question was where do women have the curliest hair? 
Fiji was the correct answer...hell, how did I know they wanted the name  of a country?
   
I took my  Biology exam last Friday.
I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells.
Apparently "Blacks" and "Mexicans" were NOT the  correct answers.
 


I've  learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of  cake.
We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand - Randy Pauch

Offline E

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #886 on: October 01, 2013, 10:09:16 PM »
Not funny.

Offline Pijanista

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #887 on: October 01, 2013, 10:22:46 PM »
Quote
I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a local bar until the last question which I got wrong.
The question was where do women have the curliest hair? 
Fiji was the correct answer...hell, how did I know they wanted the name  of a country?

 :!:

He probably had cuntry in mind

Offline Hate mail

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #888 on: October 01, 2013, 10:23:05 PM »
 :evil:
"You! Yes, you! Stand still, laddie!"

Offline Daisy

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #889 on: October 02, 2013, 06:42:26 AM »

I'd just  come out of the shop...

A fat girl served me in McDonald's...

I walked past a black kid sitting...

Snow in  the forecast and the TV weather gal...

A 10-year old Irish boy...

...

odlični  :lol:
Više volim da mi se neko izveštačeno osmehne, nego da se spontano izdere na mene.

Offline slawen

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #890 on: October 02, 2013, 05:12:06 PM »
Alal' ti ćufte Baggio.
We take no cash unless we cash justice for you! Are you listenin' to me? I'm givin' ya pearls hеrе!

Offline tempo

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #891 on: October 02, 2013, 05:35:06 PM »
Years ago it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away. But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon sandwich works best!

 :|
kad sam cuo da triglav nije u crnu goru, tri dana sam plako

Offline Pijanista

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #892 on: October 02, 2013, 05:37:28 PM »
Dobri su vicevi sto se zasnivaju na dvosmilsenosti, imaju preokret

Offline baggio

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #893 on: October 03, 2013, 11:22:46 PM »
Pricaju, Dolar, Euro i Dinar.
DOLAR:
- "Ja sam vam kao konj, kad skacem, skacem silovito, rusim sve pred sobom."
EURO:
- "Ja sam kao antilopa, skacem visoko i elegantno."
DINAR:
- "Ja sam kao lav, kad vi skocite, ja riknem :)


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Kazu da je ljubav slepa...aaaa, pa sad je meni jasno sto se zaljubljeni tolko pipaju:)


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"Je*iga!!" Prvo nemas s kim, onda nemas gde, pa onda nemas kad, I na kraju nemas s cim:)

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Mujo ljutito govori Hasi:
'Ako misliš da si pametniji od mene, onda si stvarno glup!


*******************
Mujo u New Yorku izašao u fini disko klub.
Ugleda on zgodnu ženu pa joj pridje, pruži ruku i kaže: 'Mujo.'
Ona: 'Jessy.'
Mujo: 'Tu sam, ali kako ti je ime?'




We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand - Randy Pauch

Offline Pijanista

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #894 on: October 03, 2013, 11:43:41 PM »
Quote
"Je*iga!!" Prvo nemas s kim, onda nemas gde, pa onda nemas kad, I na kraju nemas s cim:)

 :mrgreen:
A filozof ima sa kim, kad, gde i sa cim, ali cemu sve to...

Offline Mirabella

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #895 on: October 04, 2013, 12:47:22 PM »
Mujo u New Yorku izašao u fini disko klub.
Ugleda on zgodnu ženu pa joj pridje, pruži ruku i kaže: 'Mujo.'
Ona: 'Jessy.'
Mujo: 'Tu sam, ali kako ti je ime?'

 :mrgreen:
Don't argue with an Idiot.  He will bring you down to his level and beat you with experience!

Offline Jelence

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #896 on: October 05, 2013, 07:53:41 AM »
U kafani nakon pogreba kolege miša kog je ubila mišolovka sede američki, ruski i srpski miš. Američki trgne na ex dupli viski i poče se hvaliti ostalim miševima:
- Kad naiđem na mišolovku, aktiviram je repom, uhvatim zubima dok ide prema meni i bacim je sa strane.
Ruski miš otpije pola boce vodke pa će on:
- Kad ja naiđem na otrov za miševe, smrvim ga u fini prah i to stavljam ujutru u kafu da me bolje razbudi.
Srpski miš eksira svoju rakiju, pogleda ih onako sa prezirom i kaže:
- Dosta mi je vaših gluposti, odoh kući da jebem mačku!
I'll tell you something about good looking people: we're not well liked

Offline E

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #897 on: October 05, 2013, 05:04:12 PM »
 xrofl

Offline MalaKoala

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #898 on: October 08, 2013, 04:05:33 PM »
skoro pa vic (ime foruma)  :mrgreen:
http://jebes-pravila.com/forum/index.php

Offline baggio

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Re: Vic(evi)
« Reply #899 on: October 11, 2013, 04:17:00 PM »
-Nova dijeta! Šargarepa, cvekla i krompir.

-Da se kuva ili prži?

-Jok! Da se klopa.

******************

 

-Oče, jel mogu da se ispovedim?

-Što, zar nemaš tviter?

***************************
 

-Uzimati kredit je kao kad se neko upiški na mrazu.
U početku toplo i fino.


****************************

-Sa časa književnosti:
Za one koji još ne znaju, Dostojevski F.M. nije radio stanica.

We can not change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand - Randy Pauch